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Tuesday, November 19, 2013

I'm over it!

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I am about to tell you how ungrateful I am for most things that are part of my life right now. Since Scott's last post, Addie has been sick off and on. It all started with croup, then she got croup again, which turned into bronchitis/pneumonia, and I just took her to the doctor yesterday and she has yet another virus. She has been running fever since Saturday night. We cannot catch a break. I have been holding her out of church, MOPS, play dates, but she cannot get well.

Having a child that is sick for almost 4 weeks has taken the wind out of me. I am beaten down and tired. Every time we have to go to the doctor, I wonder if this is the beginning of the end for her. How terrible is that?! It is a rough way to live, but it is a reality when you have a child with a complex heart defect. I am always worried about her heart failing. It's hard. It hasn't been real fun. It makes me angry.

I miss my family. I wish we lived closer to my parents so that they could help out. I need a life line. I need a break. I always think back to the line our pastor uses at baby dedications. It is something along the lines of, give her a good life, not an easy one. I don't feel like Addie's has been either lately. Being sick for 4 weeks has been neither good nor easy.

My brother and his wife had a baby girl, Hallie, in September. I have yet to meet her because my family has been sick. That makes me sad.

I need community. I miss my friends. Staying home all day is for the birds.

Ok. I feel better. Please pray for Addie to get well.